Friday, May 05, 2006

An asshole by any other name

This morning, as I sat down for morning duty, I was approached by our school’s librarian.
She also happens to be the mother of one of my science and math kids.

Before she could even sit, the words “what have you been teaching my daughter?” escaped her lips.

A number of things passed though my mind.
We have been teaching organ systems in science…

I slapped an innocent yet inquisitive look on my face.

She begins, “My daughter called her brother a sphincter yesterday.”

If I had been drinking milk, it would have shot out my nose.
As it was I was drinking coffee. Hot coffee. It was not comfortable.

A sphincter, for those of you who do not follow the details of human anatomy, is a ring of muscle surrounding and serving to guard or close an opening or tube, such as the anus or the openings of the stomach.
It is also a synonym for “Asshole”

The story continues:

“When he asked what a sphincter was, she told him it meant he was really good at playing games. He proceeded to prance around the room joyfully shouting ‘I am a sphincter’ until she told him the true meaning of the word.”

Unfortunately, much of the humor of this situation was lost on the fact that no one in the family knew what a sphincter was. Except, of course, for my devious student.

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